The Most Ridiculous Celebrity Baby Name Of All Time

As you may have already heard, probably on the radio or as an unimportant final story on the news to lighten the mood, Kim Kardashian has finally given birth to her daughter with Kanye West. The fact she is no longer pregnant will probably be mourned by fast food corporations worldwide, judging by the intense over-hang of flab cascading down her ankles. The gargantuan size of Kim's post-pregnancy body is the least of anyone's worries right now, as many fear for the child's future, and for the struggles of all human compasses alike.


The child's name is NORTH WEST.

Yep, you heard me. North West is the newest addition to the Kardashian clan. As if Kourtney giving her daughter Penelope the middle name of Scotland wasn't bad enough, although it does make sense in terms of her father chucking some of his male egocentricity onto his offspring - Scot(land) Disick - see what I did there?

Now don't get me wrong, it's not as if I actually devote any of my spare time deliberating over the Kardashian family, who rose to fame due to Kim's ability to expose herself on the internet and the whole family's tendency to well up whenever their father's name is mentioned (which funnily enough took up enough air time to create an 8 season reality TV series). But when you witness individuals as dopey as the Kardashian sisters almost everyday on either E! or Viva, you do maintain just one shred of hope that they will not inflict any of their own short-comings onto their children, and give them a chance at a sex-tape free existence.

Was it too much to hope for? Perhaps. On Kim's interview with Jay Leno on The Tonight Show, she quickly dismisses the name North, and there is a mutual moment of 'oh thank God for that' from the audience. In fact, judging by the reaction on Twitter & Youtube, I'm feeling a universal sigh of annoyance.

The name North West was amusing the first 5 times I heard myself say it, but now it's just irritating. Can you imagine - 'Hey, I'm North West! I'm lost, can you give me directions?'

Say no more.